One of the most effective things that can be done is to normalize the experience. If you’re dealing with a PMAD, know that it’s common and you are not alone. Too often we play the comparison game with other moms, friends, and, tbh, even strangers on social media. We put pressure on to feel a certain way—that motherhood is nothing but magic, and that every day should be filled with snuggles, laughter, and compliant little ones. Listen mamas, these little people are human too! Our babies are not robots, and despite our best efforts to make the day great or stay on schedule, there will always be things that don’t go smoothly or according to plan. And it’s OK. Try to be gentle with yourself, leave room for flexibility, and take each day in stride.

Ask for it (from your partner, your friends, your family members), hire it (hello postpartum doula, night nurse, or even simply a housekeeper), or reach out for it.

The Postpartum Health Alliance Warmline is a lifesaving resource: 619-254-0023.

There are so many of us who see you. We hear you. We have been there, and we want to support you in any way that we can. It might not feel like it, but you got this, mama.

This might sound absurd, but you come first, then everyone else. It’s unnatural, I know. As moms, we often (read: always), put everyone else before ourselves. But this is undeniable: taking care of ourselves, will help us take care of our babies. Do your best to maintain healthy eating habits to keep your energy up through the day, and most importantly, sleep, whenever, wherever, and however, you can. Sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture—and torturous it is. Sleep is essential for our sanity as parents, so don’t feel guilty if you choose taking a nap over doing the dishes—it’s strictly a matter of survival.